This is the very definition and beauty of true art

This is the very definition and beauty of true art. (Re-blogged from One Thousand Single Days.)

These people had a real connection. This is what you are looking for when you are searching for a soulmate. Forever, or for a moment.

 

Is it me that I don’t get dates?

First of all, be quite sure that there isn’t a woman who cannot be won, and make up your mind that you will win her.

Thus says Ovid, our Ancient Roman dating guru.

Sooner would the birds cease their song in the springtime, or the grasshopper be silent in the summer, or the hare turn and give chase to a hound of Maenalus, than a woman resist the wooing of a youthful lover.

Maybe so, although it is my experience that if you master the secrets of attraction you don’t need to be youthful either.

Once upon a time I was love-lorn and kept falling in love without the slightest idea of how to attract and keep a woman. I would meet beautiful women or see them at a distance and have no clue how to approach them. I believed from a very young age that I was not attractive to women – and that turned out to be a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Then, through advice from friends and reading all kinds of hints, tips and strategies and actually trying them out, I began to have success, leading in the end to finding and keeping the love of my life. I started this blog and wrote Dating – the missing manual because I see too many of my male friends fail in this area – men who have good qualities any sensible woman would admire. I now know what these men are doing wrong and how they could fix it.

Think it’s because you’re too old? Wrong. Because you’re not handsome? Wrong. Because you’re not rich? Wrong again. The young, rich and handsome can and do get these things wrong. Behaviour is key. Be yourself and at the same time learn to be confident in who you are. Then learn the arts of attraction.

Ovid says:

Perhaps you think she doesn’t want to yield. You’re wrong.

Well, there will be quite a number who aren’t interested for perfectly good reasons. But if so, move on – it’s nothing to do with you and there is no shortage of attractive women out there.

Amazon thinks I’m gay

You know how Amazon keeps a lot of information about you? It keeps track of what you look at in order to put more stuff in front of your eyes that you might buy.

Looking on Amazon for a workbench (specifically the Triton SuperJaws) I found an advertisement underneath for My Regelence Rake, a novel whose cover sports two well-built men, one naked to the waist.

My wife asked me to click on the link in view of the aesthetic appeal of the man. Quite honestly he did nothing for me at all, but to please her I did. Behold, it is a Mills and Boon style novel about gay guys. Leaving aside the vexed question of what a Regelence is (did the author mean Regency?), I am left wondering why Amazon thinks I’m gay.

Does looking at a heavy-duty piece of woodworking equipment mean I’m very butch indeed?

Actually I have an alternative hypothesis. I downloaded my friend Harvey Helms’s autobiography, Blush: the unbelievably absurd diary of a gay beauty junkie, for my Kindle (US link here). It’s very funny indeed. I didn’t turn gay reading it, though, so you can buy it safely whatever your sexual orientation.

This has nothing really to do with this blog, except that Harvey’s book does teach us one very important thing, that not only can it be an heroic struggle to be who you truly are, it can also be done with humour and consideration for others, even under the most trying circumstances.